Tuesday, November 17

Douchbag of the Decade

I have a film studies class. I have a tutorial for that film studies class. That class is full of douchebags. I have come to the conclusion that if anyone ever starts a sentence with the phrase "I find..." you might as well just shoot yourself in the face. Chances are you are not a genius. You are not more insightful than anyone else. If you "find" it, then everyone else finds it too, so don't even say it. Don't take credit for common knowledge. Stop talking, its painful.

We watched Citizen Kane in that class last week, and the prof wrote the fucking text book for that class. He knows his shit. Hes a fucking professor. He talked about how there is a scene in the movie where there is the sound of a woman screaming int eh background, and he doesn't know why its there. He joked that if anyone can figure it out, they will get an A. Everyone laughed, except for this one fat fuck who took it to heart. It was a challenge. He stared long and hard at that movie, and analyzed the fucking shit outta it. He was gonna prove Dr. Jose Sanchez (real name) wrong. What he came up with was...

"Stay with me here. It was anthropomorphized non-diagetic monkey screaming.*flicks emo bangs to the side*"

He had some bullshit reason about how monkeys were mentioned one time in the entire movie, but it didn't matter because that sentence doesn't make any fucking sense. You cannot anthropomorphise a sound, you just can't, thats not what the word means. And they didn't have the technology in 19 fucking 41 to manipulate sound and even if they could why would they. Oh my god.... I'm know im ranting but i really can't get over it. I wish you were there Grant. I needed someone to share my pain with.

2 comments:

  1. You should have told him that the blood loss he has suffered from cutting his wrists has impaired his ability to analyze and think rationally lol

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  2. i feel your pain kyle, my eyeballs are bleeding after reading that sentance

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